Desperate House Lives

Forget the bubble bath commercial that "takes you away" from all your day's hassles, troubles, foibles, and faux pas! We lead wild, wonderful, wacky, lives, don't we, Ladies? How many roles do you juggle with, struggle with, and still manage to get it all done? Sleep????? Never heard of it or experienced it... Here are some state-of-the-art inventions we need: First, a self-cleaning house: Like its' counterpart, the self-cleaning oven, it cleans away dirt, dust, mold, mildew, lazy helpmates, etc. Second - computerized makeup machine: You sit, stare at a special computer screen, press the start button and it sprays your face with perfect makeup in the right places--right down to the eyeliner!!! Third -- The Clone Machine: The machine allows you to make many copies of yourself so you can be the soccer mom, the ballet mom, the cleaning mom, and still go get your nails done, pedicure done, and work your job -- ALL at the same time!!! Fourth -- Portable Spa Room -- Push a button--- a little box expands to the size of a room, complete with sauna, attendants, a masseuse, oils, and all you need for a full-size body treatment....when done, step back, push the button and it folds neatly into the size of a compact makeup container. Did you get to laugh a little? Don't we all daydream what we'd like to have that would make it easier? But then, if we had it all handed to us, we would never experience the miracles of how we do so many things as women so wonderfully well, right? Take a moment, admire what you do, what your girlfriends do, and thank your mother--she was your starting point and first mentor in successful womanhood.